Kirby Buckingham
Written by Michael on September 4th, 2009He was ready, we were not.
Kirby. Cubby. The Cubs. The Kirbster. Big Bidness. Big Guy. Big Twubbles. My Boy.
When the time had come for his very last car ride, he let me pick him up and carry him out to the car without even the slightest whimper (those with Bassetts know this isn’t normal) and he walked casually into the veterinarian’s office, even waiting patiently for me to hold the door for him. While we waited for a room, I silently wished he would become completely incapacitated or start barking at the other dogs, showing some life. Instead, he sat calmly between Amy’s legs, occasionally looking at us with the eyes that won us over a little over 3 years ago.
A million thoughts raced through my head, memories of the good times we had and my thoughts on death and what happens in the end. Our only goal was to end his pain which he was clearly in. While he was walking on his own, he hadn’t had a bite to eat or even a sip of water (Kirby had a serious drinking problem) and he hadn’t just been himself in weeks. I spent the majority of this week lying on the floor with him (still doing my conference calls at work) and he had finally let me look into his eyes for long periods of time. I saw sweetness and pain, pain he didn’t deserve.
Amy and I stayed with him while Dr. Sunderman injected h a powerful sedative followed by an overdose of a narcotic. He calmly fell asleep on his side next to Amy and I on the floor. His heart stopped about 30 seconds after the narcotic was administered. No movement whatsoever. And then he was gone.
We would have done anything to make him better- any amount of money, any amount of time. He was our child. His quality of life was the most important thing however and Amy and I could not fathom dozens of trips to the vet, surgeries, medicines and immobility. The cancer was too aggressive and we were out of time. He deserved better. We rescued him from an abusive family and someone who abandoned him. Though maybe he rescued us. He gave us better days. He deserved to be free of this pain. And now he is.
Thank you so much for finding us, big guy.
Wherever it is we we pass from this physical life, I hope to see this again
4
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Kirby had such spirit and sweetness and only wanted to be loved. He will be missed as much as we loved him until we see “big twubbles” again. I like to imagine him running and barking his head off with other dogs who have passed beyond pain and illness. We were so lucky that he joined our family even for such a short time. We love you Cubby!
5
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What a beautiful tribute to a wonderful dog. My heart breaks for you. Love, Ma
10
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I am so sorry for your loss. I too lost my precious Basset Hound, Petunia on April 5, 2008. I also rescued her from someone that abandoned her and I had her from puppyhood till she was 9. Cancer also claimed her beautiful life. She was my husband’s fishing buddy and my heart. I miss her everyday and she is buried here by the river she loved so much. You wrote a wonderful story and I thank you for it.
13
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I watched your slide show and my heart almost burst. This dog was so loved. You keep those memories close to your heart ad you will never lose them.
You must be amazing people to go to such lengths to pay tribute to a loved one.
More people should be like you and the world would be a better place.
14
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I think it was cruel. I mean no one has the right to kill anyone. Even if its a dog. Even though that the reason was to end the PAIN. We should remember that end doesn’t justify the mean. Whatever your reason may be, it is still not justifiable to put a dog to sleep. I too is a dag lover. I wont allow my dog to die in the hands of anyone especially with my CONSENT. I’d rather allow him to die with natural death as what God wanted it to be.
14
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I just stumbled upon this site and your story of Kirby was truly touching!! I can completely tell you 2 loved him dearly! I am so sorry for your loss! Your slide show was also amazing, Elsie is right, you are amazing people to go to such length to pay tribute to him.
And such amazing people are the ones I some day hope to be like. Good luck with the last leg of the pregnancy, I know your child will be in great hands!
14
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Hi Reighnee and thanks for your comment on my blog.
I have to disagree with you though as I can’t imagine that having him suffer would be less cruel than putting him to sleep peacefully. He was in terrible, terrible pain and the doctor said he would only get more sick and it was the right thing to do (even though she stated she was a devout Christian, she begged us to relieve him). Our dogs are our babies, we give them the best possible life and we would have spared any expense to make him better. Even though we felt it was the right thing to do, it was an incredibly difficult, heart wrenching experience.
I take it you’ve never had a dog, child or parent that you’ve had to watch suffer.
And who is to say that God did not want to put him to sleep? Maybe it was the natural course and his plan. Maybe I was there to save him. I can’t possibly claim to know what he wanted so I could only do whatever I could to end the poor guy’s suffering. He deserved better than that.
15
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very sweet dog, and very responsible caretaker who knows when enough is enough and pain is useless. it was great of you to be able to do the right thing for your belowed, sweet, cute dog.
15
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I, too, stumbled upon your site and was touched by your beautiful memorial for Kirby. I’m truly sorry for your loss.
16
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As I watched Kirby and read your story it brought tears to my eyes. He looked very happy and content at his last years with you.
I had to put my Nicki to sleep after 13 years and it was the hardest thing for me to do. I tried to keep him with me but the time came and nicki let me know it was time. I held him when he went to sleep. That was 2 years ago and he is still greatly missed.
I found a video on you tube about pets that have passed and although I cry everytime I see it, it does help.
If you would like me to email you a copy send me you email.
My email is froggy11@ptd.net.{we used to call Nicki Froggy}
20
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An incorrect link; brought me here! I KNOW your pain and sorrow. The love you have for your pets is evident. Two of my favorite things – Dogs, and Izzy…. We are a family of Labs and too had to confront the SAME scenario. Pet Lovers (not necc owners) and Pet Lovers alone can only know what you are going through and understand your reasoning. Blue was our first to be “let go” due to cancer at the age of 12 – which has already been over 15+ years and there isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t think of him, Stetson, and Grunt that had to leave us. We now have 2 wonderful Labs (of course) who seem to channel pets of the past – so carry on – and know that there are so many people who fell for you… Keep the love alive!
24
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We lost our Max almost 10 years ago now. His registered name was “Max you S.O.B.” because even from puppy-hood he was always finding ways to reach things that no one thought he could! He was an 85lb. basset who was always tripping on his ears while chasing deer down in the hill country. His last hours here sounded a lot like your Kirby’s. He was hurting and ready to be done.
I still miss his drooly face and “ooofing” around. I’m so sorry for your loss and believe you will see him again!
25
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I’m absolutely tearing up over your loss and the beauty of the love you have for your “canine children”. I had to put one of my late dogs to sleep and another one passed without aid. I want to thank you for sharing your story. We have two male siblings now that are 2 1/2 – known as “our boys”. We dog lovers are a “breed” all our own too.
25
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Dearest Michael,
I fell upon your website purely by chance (if that’s possible)only to be amazed at the love you felt for your sweet puppy, Kirby. As many other lucky pet owners I too had a Bassett Hound, “Sam” (Samantha) who was the most lovable, sweet natured dog. After many years of suffering a skin allergy from dirt of all things and my giving her weekly injections of allergy medicine we decided as a family to also put her out of her agony. My father let me make the decision and he brought her to the vet. I’d never seen my father so emotionally upset when he returned home.
I lost my father July 13th and know in my heart that he is with Sam and the other pets we’ve had. This life is just a transition into a bigger more wonderful existence. I truly believe that now.
You did the right thing for Kirby and your family in letting her go to rest.
Warmest regards,
Suz
27
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I just accidentally came to your site and saw this post. It was so touching and I feel really sorry for your loss.
You are such a great person to put a tribute like this. Your puppy is so adorable.
I do not know much about puppies but I like to know what is the kind of your puppy. :)
/Chinthaka
28
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What a beautiful tribute to your Kirby–it brought tears and my own heartache that goes along with having to have had a pet dog euthanized. It is such a hard decision but the right decision and the right thing to do. No pet (or human) deserves to have to go through all that suffering. I am so sorry for your loss.
29
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Hi Michael…I as well stumbled upon your website today and am sitting here at work crying my eyes out watching your video. I am so sorry for your loss.
I have had dogs all my life and my husband and I currently have a Boston Terrier and a Pug who are both “middle-aged”. We play with them as much as possible, take them everywhere w/ us, and cuddle with them in our bed every night. They are our children too as Kirby was yours.
I know that he is looking down upon your family and is thankful for the wonderful life you gave him. Take care of yourself!
~ Patty
29
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I too have just visted your site (via a fun fwd email of a puppy licking a screen!) and having laughed out loud at the screen cleaning , I now find myself almost in tears after reading about your dear Kirby.
A friend of my husband has just named his little jack russell pup Kirby and apparently he is utterly adorable- so the name and personality lives on!
Hope the birth has gone well and brought you lots of love at this time.
best wishes from a grey Swansea,
Liss
30
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Another response from a stranger, but if anything that should show that your dog was a special being. I came across this b/c of a link on my canine epilepsy listserv. I worry daily about losing my dog to epilepsy, and know what it is like to watch animals suffer. The decision to put my cat to sleep due to horrible respiratory disease was one of the hardest moments of my life. I was the last thing he saw before he died. I could not believe it possible, but I am even closer to my dog. I truly feel your pain and, even as an Agnostic, I say, wholeheartedly, “If there is no heaven for dogs, then I want to go where they go.”
May you find your friend again someday.
2
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I, too, stumbled upon your website by accident. As an animal lover, your story drew me in. Having had the same experience too many times in my 57 year of life, and dreading it more and more with each animal/child who finds/adopts me, I was brought to tears. The background choice of music helped…very beautiful, and very sad.
2
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I am sorry to hear about this. I have lost a few friends, all of them before their times. Regardless of the steps that you or anybody else takes with their pets/family members, it’s a very personal trip, and I thank you for sharing it.
5
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My brother had a basset named Mija. She lost her life to cancer that like Kirby, was very aggressive. While living with him, I went on travel for only 22 days. When I left, she and I were as playful as ever. When I came back, she was ridden with the disease. She only lived another three weeks. My brother was trying to decide whether or not to put her down and she made up his mind for him. I had given her a bath for she had piddled herself and put her on her blanket by the front door. I left for work and about two hours later when my brother got home, she had passed. It was one of the saddest days of my life. I miss her every day. I have two bassets myself and worry each day about when their time will come. Thank you for your tribute to a wonderful family member!
8
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I’m another website stumbler and so grateful for it.
I know your pain, and love for your little friends. I’ve had to go through the same thing with my dachshunds, and still remember the tearful goodbyes. I know they are loved even more, but will always dream about them and miss them.
Thanks for your wonderful tribute.
15
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There is a special place in Hell for people who abuse animals. May whatever God you believe in rest his little soul!
17
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My sympathy on your loss. It’s heartbreaking.
Having grown up with Bassetts I know how much fun they can be. The running, the howling, and oh yes, the drool. They’re loveable clowns and ours were like an old married couple by the time their time with us ended. Boswell & Geraldine, we miss you.